Saturday, April 24, 2021

The Final Goodbye

This lady, oh this lady will be sorely missed.  The past couple of days have been a whirlwind of activity as we prepared to bid our final farewells.  Yesterday was her funeral and a beautiful funeral it was.  The boys, her boys put it all together and picked out the flowers, her outfit and coffin.  It was stunning and she looked beautiful.  Lots of pink.  Pink coffin, pink dress and the coffin spray were pink and dark pink roses that draped over the lid.  She would have been so very pleased.  
The boys spoke, each sharing a story showing her strength, tenacity, her drive to protect and survive.  They were funny stories and showed us how she was always able to smile even though she struggled to take care of those rowdy boys and raise them up to be the wonderful men they are today.  
Our two girls each spoke eloquently about their beloved Mimi.  Their words made me so proud.  Their bond with their Mimi was evident in their words and the love they espoused brought me to tears.  It was just a beautiful service to celebrate the life and an amazing woman.  
After the service everyone was invited to come to our house to share a meal of one of her favorites, spaghetti and lasagna.  I ordered Olive Garden and it was delivered hot and yummy.  The food was devoured as everyone enjoyed visiting from near and far.  Cousins flew in and it ended up being a mini reunion.  How wonderful to see everyone and tell the stories we loved most about this mighty woman.  
So now, we carry on, disperse her belongings to family and tidy up the loose ends of her life.  We will share tears and stories as the hearts heal a bit more everyday.  For me it has reopened that last wound so fresh from losing Daddy so recently.  I may not have sobbed but I've cried silent tears for the losses.  She was a mother to me and I feel that loss.  The past couple of nights I wake up to make one of my many trips to the bathroom but getting back to sleep takes a couple of hours because she is all I think of.  Her last moments of happiness seem to be on my mind a lot.  Last night I told The Hubby that I have two last memories of her but I chose to discard one and keep the other.  

That fateful day, Easter Sunday the one I toss aside is the moment of the stroke.  I, instead remember her sitting at the kitchen table at lunch eating her plate of ham, potato salad, green beans, shoving it all together with her beloved roll into a lump, never minding if it is all mixed up.  That is how she ate everything.  If there had been Jello and mashed potatoes on that fork she loved it.  She ate with gusto that day and drank several small glasses of pink wine, laughing and oohing and awing over sweet Min calling her Mimi for the first time.  She was at her happiest at that moment sitting across from me at that table.  I chose that memory to hold onto.  I didn't go to the hospital to see her, I didn't look at her in the casket.  I just do not want to have that be my last picture in my mind.  I choose the vision of her across that table.  

I love you Gloria as my mother-in-law, my mother.  

 

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