Tuesday morning and I'm sitting on my favorite spot on the loveseat. There is no sound except for my fingers tapping away on the keyboard and the roar of the A/C trying to keep the house cool at 8:30 in the morning. Summer in July has hit. I let Clayton out at 5 this morning and the air was so thick with heat you could cut it, but I like Oklahoma summers. I went to workout, rushed home to shower, then maybe paint this morning, yet, here I sit. The TV sits silent I'm letting my mind wander as it often does. Sometimes my brain is so full of different thoughts that it makes me a bit nuts with all the ramble in the head. I'm remembering being young and newly married today. Not sure why that has popped up, but it has.
When I was a girl the one thing I wanted more than anything in the entire world was to get married and have children. Of course this made sense, there was not much of a future promised for me anyway. I was brought up in the era and small town era of marriage and kiddos. Oh, there were girls that went to college, but I was not encouraged to follow that kind of dream. I wanted to be a lawyer first, then an archeologist and then a veterinarian but you have to want to do good in school, I didn't so much. I didn't do any of those careers, but that's okay. I had a dream and I did fulfill that. The schooling came later. When The Hubby and I and married we were both 19 years old and I thought I had all the knowledge about being married, I was WRONG! I didn't realize that you had to do stuff when you set up house like wash dishes and clothes and cook. I could all of those things and had for awhile, but I realized very quickly that they were my new responsibility, FOREVER! No one told me that those chores and more were what moving out and having a house of your own would mean. I am still rebelling against it all. I'm good at it all but hate it too. My brother, sister and I always had chores at home, that was a given, but they were chores. You didn't realize that they could become your life. The first few months of our marriage I remember working all day, coming home and cooking dinner and then crying into the sink while washing the dishes because I was tired and didn't want to clean up. You don't realize that the refrigerator needs to cleaned out once in awhile. The laundry does not wash itself. Floors get nasty dirty from a ditch digging, attic crawling husband comes home everyday. We do have to eat you know and how about the trips to the grocery store and the neverending menu planning. This, my friends is what you sign up for when you get married, actually, it is what you sign up for when you just flat move out of the comfy digs of living with your parents. It is called life and it carries on. No matter how much your parents try to teach you to survive on your own you won't truly know until you live it.