Tuesday, November 09, 2021

Join or Not to Join

 The past weekend was wonderful and relaxing, but...an issue arose Saturday evening while our group gathered for dinner and celebrate three birthdays.  We were at J&S's cabin and there were seven women and eight men in attendance.  The men typically all hang around the fire pit outside, weather permitting, while the ladies are inside around the fireplace.  My question is, "is it me."  

Here's the story:  

While we were all inside chatting I was sitting in the living room in the ring around the coffee table and fireplace in a chair while on the couch two ladies sat chatting.  Then across from me in two chairs sat two other ladies and to the right of me sitting alongside the fireplace sat two more.  These three groups of two all sat chatting away while I sat in my chair absolutely NOT included in any of the talk.  I sat quietly, with my wine glass in hand and just looked around the room catching bits and pieces of each conversation.  It was honestly uncomfortable to be left out of three different conversations.  In fact at one time the lady on the couch closet to me physically turned her back to talk to the other lady on the couch.  Do any of the ladies not see that not including me was weird.  Maybe I'm just being odd myself by feeling this way but the whole thing lasted about 30 minutes of me sitting and sipping listening to the different conversations, not including me.  I felt odd man out in a way.  Then I told The Hubby about it last night and he actually said, "well you kind of don't mingle well."  WTF!  I do too but the way the room was set up I was left out, by no fault of mine actually.  This is not the first time something like this has happened here with these people by the way.  I think it just kind of happens by the way the room is set up, but my problem is do I just step into one of the conversations and join.  I've actually done that on occasion but I feel awkward doing that.  Am I just feeling weird where there is no weird?  In situations like this sometimes I jump in with a story that totally doesn't mix and feel even more awkward as they stare at me.  I'm just trying to fit in somewhere where a lot of these ladies have a lot in common where I do not.  Oh maybe it's just a pity party that no one needs to join.  
Should I feel weird about this?


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