Have you ever lost anything of value? Do you still think about it? Imagine how you'd feel if you'd given it away instead.
Wow, that question made me immediately think about my virginity. Don't know why it did but that is where this mind goes. When I was young, high school, 17 or 18 I had plenty of chances of giving what I thought a most precious gift away. Yeah, yeah, I'm old fashioned but that is me.
Across the street from my house and down a block was the local Humpty Dumpty grocery store. We walked to the store all the time and when I was 17 or so there was one of the sack boys working that I had a huge crush on. Actually, there were several but this flavor of the week had my attention. He was ahead of me in school by a couple of years and I thought out of my league, but crushes don't understand that. I found every opportunity I could to walk to the store. I would look in the pantry and announce to Momma that she needed corn or green beans or whatever, anything to venture through the checkout line. Finally, after a week or two of that I got a phone call from said crush to join him at a party! OH MY GOSH! I was over the moon. He came by, picked me up and we traveled to Tulsa where we ended up parked on a street where construction for a new housing addition was taking place, no inhabitants. I asked him where the party was and he reached into the backseat to pull a beer out of an ice chest, "Right here," he says. Uh oh! I didn't partake because at the time my parents were HUGE beer drinkers and I wasn't, had never even had a drink. Okay, I was a bit of a prude, naive, innocent, but knew what I wasn't going to do. We smooched a bit but it didn't go too far. Party, Harrumph! At one point he looked in the rear view mirror to fix his hair and actually said, "Not bad looking, huh!" That should have put my radar up but I was young.
I was so eat up with this guy and somehow one afternoon I ended up at his house with no one home. He put on Chicago VII album, in particular the song, Wishing You Were Here, can hardly hear that song without thinking of him. Anyway, back to the making out. It was heavy, very, very heavy, no clothes kind but the old fashioned kind of gal I was in my head knew that this was not right. I halted it! He was not happy and I can't blame him, I was a tease I guess but reality was flooding my brain. I left him very angry. Later I talked to him on the phone and he told me, "You'll never get a guy unless you give it up. No guy will want someone who doesn't know how...blah, blah, blah!" I knew right then, through all the tears, that I was right. He was a jerk and I was so glad I didn't give it up to him because I saved it for the most perfect guy in the world for me, The Hubby.
I can't imagine if I had gone all the way with the guy. Hell, he didn't even have protection and I surely didn't. What if I had gotten pregnant. I was reminded all the time of my friend Jean Ann who was dealing with that and I surely didn't want to follow in her footsteps or some of my close relatives. My life might have taken a very different turn if I had followed the young heat. What about you? Have you ever lost anything of value? Do you still think about it? Imagine how you'd feel if you'd given it away instead. It doesn't have to be anything this intense but does make you think, doesn't it.
3 comments:
yeah, my sweaters I just shrunk in the wash.....
But, seriously I really wish I hadn't lost my Cabbage Patch doll, Aubrey June, in Colorado on that ski trip. Life just wasn't the same after that.
My Great-Granny gave me her and it was a huge blow when I realized I had left her in some hotel along the I-40
:(
This is a hard question to answer. But unlike sensible you, I did succumb to the guy I was dating before my husband (I was much older than your typical first timer these days ;-) ) and that is still a bit of a regret....especially considering in hindsight how little I meant to him even after 3 years together.
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