Readers where are they

You know I feel as if I'm writing to myself here and in a sense I am but I would like a little audience here. It seems like no one EVER visits my blog except a good friend and a VERY occasional stranger. I've tried visiting and commenting on others blogs. I read over 30 blogs, not always commenting on them but I do read. I just don't get it. Does my writing or my life not appeal to others or am I just not marketing myself that well? I am really a novice to this stuff as far as computer-eaze goes but I've learned by trial and error. I guess I'm not that new as I've been blogging since about 2006. I just don't know where to go. I tried to sign up on BlogHer and I have so much trouble getting that blasted site to keep my info updated. I spent an entire hour last night (and that's not the first time) trying to get my info on there and just became frustrated and quit. I've read on Blogger about how to sign up with blog directories and I've done a few but still I sit and the tally marks of visitors keep adding up but they are mostly my own looking at my blog as I like to look at my pictures. It's a comfortable place for me to visit and I don't know why it isn't for others. Oh well, I will just continue to blog here and one of these YEARS maybe someone will find me and visit.

I've been in a fog for several, several days now and I can't quite explain what is going on with me. I think, think I've blogged about possibly being visited by Mother Nature after 6 months of nothing and that being the culprit. It could also be the unending rain that is plaguing this area and most of the Midwest now. I remember when I was about 14 years old when there was a June where it rained and stormed almost the entire month so I guess we were due for the torrential rains, but two years in a row I'm about done. Last week I didn't work out much as I felt terrible and today I was very low key at Jazzercise and the personal trainer, Wade commented how low my energy level was today. In fact, my knees and ankles are bothering me which is probably from the moisture and mugginess that has been ongoing.

Yesterday we spent Father's Day at my Bro and Sis-in-law's. The Sis and her hubby brought baby-back ribs and smoked chicken and I did the salad. It was very nice but my Daddy being Daddy he gets restless and can't stay much past the eats. At least he came outside and sat with us for a bit while we enjoyed the pool but he just had to hit the road and go home to sit in his chair and vegetate. I used to think it was Momma that was antsy to get home but you know it was both of them. He just gets fidgety and has to move on. The minute he got there he started in on his hearing aids not working, like he needed an excuse to leave. Bro and his wife invite him all the time to eat with them but he says he can't hear in their living room so he won't come over but in large groups. I think yesterday we all agreed that Daddy's social skills are a little lacking and he feels uncomfortable around everybody. You know he is only 72 years old (73 in August) and you would think he is in his 90's the way he crips around and complains that his mind doesn't work and on and on and on, but the man does two crosswords and two cryto-quotes every morning. He has a computer and he loves to play bridge, solitaire, hearts, spades etc all the time. He has his mind and he is able to mow the yard (on a riding one) several times a week, garden, weed, and all that kind of stuff. When we three kids get around or he gets lonely he is a "helpless" old man and I just hate that. He needs to get plugged into the community and have a good time instead of relying on us to keep him company. We have our own very busy lives and he is very capable of finding his own entertainment. Now don't get me wrong, I DEARLY love my Daddy and will be there to take care of him but when he is able I just don't get it. It's a little frustrating. The Hubby's Momma will be 81 in September and at B & B's wedding she was swing dancing. She is a lady on the move, got her mind and is quite elegant. She doesn't sit around feeling sorry for herself or mourning over her man endlessly. Well, that's a lie, she has had some moments but she doesn't sit around long. Daddy still goes to the grave and cries and talks to Momma. I feel that that is not them and I never visit. When he was drinking he would visit his parents and brother and come by my house a crying drunk. I just don't have the tolerance for any of it anymore. I've given to him, The Hubby, my kids, my community and I'm DONE! It is for me now and I'm not going to give into it. YES, I'm selfish now but I've earned it over the years, besides Sis said if he needed to live with someone he could live with her. More power to her. She's the baby of the family and she has taken upon herself to be his babysitter. You go girl. Don't let me stop you.

Sorry for the ranting but I'm just in that kind of mood today. Dark and dreary.