Tuesday, September 17, 2019

New York City- 2019-Art Show

Yes, we did it.  We went to New York for a few days and had an absolute grand time.  

I must say it started off good, until we hit the Charlotte airport, or at least nearly there.  Good grief, there were storms around and lightening so we had to circle a bit and when we landed we sat in the plane for nearly an hour and a half because of lightening.  It virtually shut down the airport because they would not let any staff out on the tarmac, understandably.  BUT, that meant our 30 minute window to the next flight was screwed.  I was encouraged because the airport was shut down that meant no flights were allowed to leave.  Finally, FINALLY we were at the gate but had to wait for The Hubby's carry-on bag he insisted he didn't want to check but the still had to because of space.  Then the race was on to try and get to our gate, we had 15 minutes!!!  Actually, by the time we finally got there it had already left.  I was extremely upset but what could we do.  Well, I didn't panic (a first for me) and we got in a 30 minute line to get a flight out to New York.  The lady was so extremely nice and we had a flight a couple of hours later so we decided to eat dinner.  (We ate a lot of airport food 😞 I was concerned about my bag and exactly where it might be but another extremely helpful guy assured me it was on it's way to NYC ahead of me!  

Finally on the flight to NYC and I was excited for our journey.  We arrived and were met by the driver from our hotel we set up.  I found The Walker Hotel in Greenwich Village which was only .2 miles around the corner from the Salmagundi Club for the art reception.  What a gem of a hotel.   The hotel had the look and feel of being there for many years but The Hubby started quizzing the staff and found out it had only been around for 7 years!  Wow, they did a great job of making it look old.  The restaurant inside, Society was good too.  I had eggs Benedict for the first time too.  
Every evening the staff left cookies on a glass plate by the bed, yummy cookies.  Plus everyone was extremely helpful.  The bartender we struck up a nice report with was Freddy.  What sweet kid.  

Rested from our travels we spent the day Saturday walking and I mean WALKING!  I probably walk/ran a half a mile in the Charlotte airport the day before then we did it again on Saturday, not run though.  
After awhile my feet were tired of the shoes I brought and I usually bring different ones to wear.  It helps my feet to change out the shoes but I didn't bring extras!  So first thing I had to do was find a store to buy some tennis shoes.  Oh gosh, saved my feet for sure.   
I was proud of myself though walking and walking and walking with a LOT of sit down breaks and The Hubby was wonderful about it all.  He was incredibly supportive about it all, just wanted me to be able to enjoy and DO IT!  
Oh I forgot all about this.  The Hubby first wanted to check out the Chelsea Flea Market he has heard about for years.  He has a friend that sets up there sometimes, but not this time.  I really wasn't too impressed and I must say, walking through it all there was a weird smell sometimes from the stuff, like musty to urine.  Whew!  But it was what he wanted to do and the whole trip was for me.

We walked to Madison Park and Washington Park (thank goodness for lots of benches.)  So many people and lots of dogs. 
One of the many respites along the way.

The Flatiron Building and area which The Hubby loves.

I took this photo of an older gentleman sitting I think in Washington Square Park.  I think it will be a great painting!

Then Sunday morning it was up, breakfast and wait till 1pm for the Allied Artists of American reception at The Salmagundi Club.  I had other walking shoes (a bit dressier) and we walked the .2 miles to the show.  It was just around the corner basically.  

I have to tell you, I one of those kind of people that stay in the hotel, don't venture out very far at all.  My stomach, my nerves, my FEAR does not allow me to do the stuff we did this past weekend.  I felt like an entirely different person, able to handle what was thrown at me.  And I think usually The Hubby and his expectations of stuff and my fear of HIM getting us lost is part of it too, but this time, it was all a breeze.  NO FEAR, a teeny bit of anxiety but really it was awesome!  

THERE it is on the wall at the Salmagundi Art Club, hanging on their walls!  What an exciting feeling.  

This building is over 200 years old guys, incredible and extremely creeky.  There was fantastic art everywhere and this was a once in a lifetime thing for me.  

I didn't win anything but I'm okay with that, I wasn't expecting too but it was an honor to be in the show, truly.  I couldn't be upset with anything.

Thursday, August 29, 2019

Another Weight Loss Story

I haven't shared this lately but in June I went to my GYN appointment and stepped on the scale to be shocked.  Honestly, I wasn't as shocked as I should have been, but the scale was 249, and I am being truthful here.  I knew I was hurting and struggling to even walk around the house, but again I had my  head in the sand.  Another thing was that I was eating a ton of fast food, and LYING to myself about it.  I pulled into Sonic one day and the carhop said to me that I wasn't in my usual spot....WTF!  Plus my blood pressure, which is good now, but that is with meds.  I want off the meds.  It was time to drastically take some action.  
I mean look at that caboose going on there.  It is obscene.   So I started some research on different kinds of plans, cost and types of food.  I've done Weight Watchers, and it has worked for me.  I've done the no carb thing, and that works.  But for me, and my lifestyle lately, I needed prepared food, in portions that I don't really have to think about.  Grab and go, portion control, those were top on my list of what I needed to try and make this weight thing GO AWAY, or at least get manageable.   

I will NEVER have this kind of body again, but I can be comfortable and more able to walk and deal with life.  I opted for Nutrisystem and have been quite satisfied with it so far.  My first delivery arrived in two different batches of frozen foods and regular stuff.  It was a lot of food because I chose three meals and snacks a day, and you add stuff like veggies.  Then, after a bit you add  power fuels and smart carbs.  The first month was very, very limited at 1000 calories.  I really wasn't hungry much and I tried to have salads and lots of frozen veggies (my favorite broccoli.)  There are also shakes but after a couple of months I started wanting to throw them up.  They taste good but for me it was a texture and milk-like (milk I hate) quality that was getting to me.  I've stopped them for awhile.
Those were the days...sigh...

The weight slowly started dropping, and dropping.  It's a slow process but it was a slow process to get into the shape I'm in.  I was in no rush to lose it fast, because I don't want my butt or tummy hitting my knees with extra skin!
17 pounds down

The calorie count now is 1200 calories and I try to stay under but closer to 1000-1200 everyday.  Now I'm doing mostly breakfasts, lunches and snacks and opting to fix dinner for The Hubby and myself.  But that's not much different as it's a protein and veggies.  I do eat out a lot at dinner time and have to deal with the lake experience but I try not to overdo it and get right back to the routine.  I'm making better choices when we go out to eat but I am NOT going to punish myself over what I want.  I've been good, except for last Monday night.  I truly TRULY was craving Mexican food, our old haunt El Rio Verde, and I told The Hubby that is what I wanted for dinner.  Cheese enchiladas, rice, beans, guacamole, chips and a good old diet Pepsi was my dinner and I did NOT feel ashamed, I enjoyed it and the next morning was back to my portion control breakfast and lunch. 

This will be a long journey and I've made my goals achievable.  My total goal is 50 pounds.  After I reach that then I will re-access and probably make new goals.  As of this morning I am down 17 pounds and I know that's a lot since June, but I have a lot to lose, and I'm trying to really tow the line here.  I hope to be 25 pounds down by Christmas.  I may slow down, but if I keep up the workouts it will help me to reach my goals.  In reality I will probably reach the 50 sooner but I'm not going to stress myself out over it.  It is one day at a time.  I have a lot of things I want to do in my life and I need to be mobile to do them.  
I'm also dealing with some arm issues and finally got into the orthopedic last Friday.  Lots of x-ray's and talk (I love the doctor) to find out I have some cervical issues in my neck, like degenerative disc disease, osteoarthritis of my spine with radiculopathy (pinched nerve) and acute shoulder bursitis!  Oh BOY! This is not fun.  I've been getting chiropractic care, intense massages and now on steroids and nerve meds to try and take the pain away.  It is affecting my art in a bad way, like NOT wanting paint and can't, because of the pain.  But, as of today I've taken the last steroid and I am better.  It's still there a bit, but it's like 95% better, livable and I can sleep!  

With this kind of pain going on I could just give up the weight loss journey, but I WILL NOT let this impede my success.  I have a new granddaughter arriving very soon and I need to be able to sit on the floor with her to play.  

Saturday, August 24, 2019

Busy Life, Or Is It

This week was kind of free week for me.  I really didn't have to go into the office much, just step in to make a deposit or type a quick quote.  This meant I could go to my happy place, my studio.  Oh, forgot that Monday I did go to the chiropractor, my Daddy's and then a luncheon (ladies from my high school days!)  The luncheon was wonderful fun and even had one show up that had NOT BEEN BACK in 45 years!  It was awesome to see Jodi.  

You know as I looked at the calendar for the week I was incredibly busy.  Later that evening I picked up my studio partner and we attended the business part of one of our art groups.  I had book club this week, and we went to see Hamilton on Tuesday evening with friends.  OH MY GOODNESS, that was an awesome show.  More chiropractic visits and yesterday a visit to a orthopedic specialist in sports medicine.  You see, I'm having some issues with my shoulder.  I woke up one morning in June and could hardly lift my arm and the pain was excruciating.  The fear, as an artist, at that moment, was that it was rotator cuff.  I was having such an issue sketching even.  I've been dealing with the pain by taking Aleve, my trainer stretching me a lot, the chiropractor and massage therapy (my girl is AWESOME!)  It is better, but I needed to make sure it wasn't RC.  Yesterday I got in and they took tons and tons of x-ray's and the doctor (I LOVE HER) said it was NOT RC!!!!!  Hallelujah, BUT, I have some neck spongy disc issues.  For one thing my neck spine doesn't curve the right way, the exact opposite and with some of the discs deteriorating a bit she suspicions a pinched nerve and bursa inflammation.  So the first course of action is to continue chiropractic, massage, stretching and now steroids on board and something (can't remember the name) for the pinched nerve.  We're going to watch it until I get back from LA next month and proceed if it isn't any better with higher dosages or injections.  YIKES! 

The good thing is I did step away from the sketching and started applying some paint.  Long ways to go on this one and I will continue on with my self portrait series.  

You know looking at this photo reminds me how very young I was.  This was taken at The Hubby's house in the front yard, where he grew up.  It was summer and we were dating.  It was probably July or August and from the rumpled look, well, use your imagination!  We were young and in love and getting married in a few months.  I don't know why I like this picture but I do.  It just reminds me of being in love, young and seeing a new future ahead for me, one that I did not see on the horizon a few months earlier.  I still had an innocence in my look, yet not.  I was on the doorstep to a new future.  

Saturday, August 17, 2019

Urge To Purge

It's been a minute since I've posted but I've been very busy,  busy with sketching that is.  After writing the last post about "ME" I started looking at the photos and wanted to sketch them, then paint and hopefully make an entire show around the world of "ME" and my evolution from baby to adult (so far.)  

This one I used to also reference my anger, disappointment, and utter deflation on finding out that I was yet again turned down membership in Women Artists of the West (WAOW).  I have entered no less than three times and just knew that the third time was the charm but I was sadly mistaken.  I mean, really, what does it take.  Good grief I juried into one of the biggest show around in NYC!  Well, I'm not giving up and will again enter in the fall.  
Then it is back to sketching... 

Today, Saturday I decided it was finally time to yet again organize my closet.  You know, since we have been married, 43 years, we have moved every 10 years so I at least clean out and get rid of every 10 years.  But, we have been in this house 14 years and WOW, it does accumulate.  I've had the incredible urge to purge lately.  Probably because Brother and his wife built a new house and have moved and my studio partner, Linda and her hubby bought a new house (after 25 years) and moved and is purging.  It just put me in the mood and I needed to do it before fall.  Last night when I went to bed I told myself, "Tomorrow it is clean closet time," and this morning after coffee that is exactly what I did.  I purged clothes to go to Goodwill (or other) and my purses, OMG, my purses.  Really I have a love-hate relationship with them and there were some that I had not carried since 2013, (there's proof with receipts in them.)  Plus they are not cheap, my love-hate relationship is with Coach purses.  EGAD!  I also know Sister loves Coach, so, I sent her a text asking if she wanted, and guess what the answer was, YES!!!  Yeah, they will go to her house on Monday and I only kept a select few that I more than love.  I got rid of at least 15 purses guys!!! 
Part of my clean out agenda was to go through every single purse and pull out the trash, receipts, notes, fingernail files, my pocketknife I lost, gum, change, a $10 bill and lots and lots of fortunes form fortune cookies that I collect.  One of these days I will use them in one of my paintings, maybe one of the self portraits.  

Saturday, August 03, 2019

MY Life in the Fast Lane

At our art show/opening the other night a friend commented to me that she didn't know how I did it all.  I honestly haven't heard that from anyone since my girls were young and you, well, you have children and work and some sort of a life.

My oldest is in that world right now, going and going and going.  The youngest is getting ready to jump into the world of motherhood, the roller coaster of parenthood.  It's a world where you can get lost in the daily minutiae of life in general, the me is no longer.  I remember those days, I want to say fondly, but not really.  It was hard work getting them to and from their lives and trying to work and trying to find a smidgen of a second for me.  

I thought that when they were grown and gone that life might slow down, and it did in a way.  So, why not mask, you have a few minutes...LOL!
When they were little there was of course all the school to and fro, the after school activities and I did a bit of volunteering at the schools.  Plus I was also still working at the office but often brought it home in the evenings to do spreadsheets or pay bills, etc., after everyone was in bed.  When they were older and my driving time was not necessarily needed I went back to school myself.  I traded the running around with them to me and my head stuck in a book.  I really never had too much down time.  

Then they flew the coop, we moved, I was still working, and then dealt with the losses.  What to do but PAINT!  The other night I realized that I traded a lot of those tasks for yet another aspect of my life, my art journey.  It takes a lot of time and effort to not only create works of art but, if you want to sell, compete or make a name, it is hard to do.  I am constantly looking at the various venues to have shows, or online on the websites that broker the art shows all over the country.  I can spend days reading the prospectuses of the ones I want to enter and then you have to fork out entry fees, have the right size jpeg scans of your images (after you take them to scanners - another cost).  It is almost full time, plus I'm STILL working at our office.  I go there and pay bills, payroll, meet with accountants or insurance people.  I luckily don't have to actually be in the office as much anymore, thank goodness but it's still time away from what I really want to do.  Yet our business is what has allowed me to do my painting, enter shows, and travel to workshops. 
Whew, I need the weekend to just relax my mind sometimes.  Hammock time, rats it's raining, so screened porch it is.  

Monday, July 29, 2019

My Evolution

Look at that face.  Do you think I had any aspirations of being an explorer, a traveler, a rebel!  I think back then I might have.  I do know I was a handful, according to my parents.  They said I would be getting my little hand spanked grabbing for something on a table, but that it didn't phase me as I was grabbing for something with the other hand.  

Mother told me that I was always running off and getting lost and hiding in stores.  It got to the point that she decided one day in the Sears store she was going to teach me a lesson.  That lesson, was to let me get lost where she could see me, but I could not see her.  That little lesson scared me for life, and to this day I have a horrible fear of getting and being lost.  I know she meant well, but this little prank made a mark that has taken a lifetime to try to over come, and not successfully.  That fear has morphed into a fear of not wanting to get into trouble or get lost.  Hence the fear of airport security sort of like a principal's office, not that I've EVER was in that kind of trouble.

Two days before my little sister was born (I was 3 years old and brother was maybe 16 months) I climbed up on a television that was sitting on a high cabinet and pulled it over on myself.  My first stitches, and you can sometimes still see the scar in my eyebrow.  I don't think my brother or sister had too many, if any stitches, broken bones or sprains in childhood, but I certainly did.  I even have a huge scar cross-ways on my tummy from sliding off the back of a car onto a metal license plate which slit my belly open.  That only took a home visit from the doctor (they did that back then) and band aids to hold it all together, no stitches.  I could swing really REALLY high on the swings and jungle-gym bars, not afraid of falling at all.  When does fear start taking hold?  Where does fear come from and why in some people does it become a problem and for others not influence them at all.  Very curious that question.  
Look at those big brown innocent eyes.  That's my first grade picture and when the big fear thing started coming on.  That's when we had to move to Arkansas for daddy a job.  The move was scary and I had to leave my friends and my favorite teacher, Mrs. Rhodes.  Making new friends was difficult and my first teacher there was a WITCH or BITCH if you want.  She was forced into retirement the next year and there were good reasons why.  I watched her wash a boys mouth out with soap in the classroom (we had our own bathrooms in the room.)  She would paddle, and I mean PADDLE in front of the classroom.  I never wanted to get in trouble in her class for sure.  That would break you and I think she did break a lot of children.  I wet my pants in front of the whole classroom while standing at the chalkboard, just because I asked to go to the bathroom one day, and then had to ride the bus home with urine soaked clothes.  I went from having the nicest, most wonderful teacher ever, to the worst teacher that year.  Plus I was witness to my parents struggle financially and with their marriage.  I know sister was too young to remember and brother may remember some but he was only 4.  The school bus ride alone (my first time for that) was kind of harrowing because we rode the bus with all ages, from 1st grade to 12th.  Those boys were mean, MEAN!  

Living in Arkansas allowed us to meet all kinds of different people and experience family lifestyles that were totally different than ours.  Lots of poor people, more poor than we were for sure.  My friend Sharon from up the road and around the corner was from a family of about 8 kids.  They had no electricity or running water, but they did have a pet raccoon.  That family was as good as gold though and she was my savior on those bus rides back and forth to school.  This was also a time when my daddy got sick.  They really didn't know what was wrong with him but he was CRAZY, and Momma just couldn't cope.   She even left him and Granddaddy made her go back, telling her that Daddy was sick, that he needed her.  This was after we finally found out what was making him so sick.  

I have a very vivid memory of us being at my Granny and Granddaddy's house, the house my father lives in now, and where I basically grew up.  The memory is of my father sitting on their bed, that is now his bed, and him sobbing in his hands, SOBBING.  I had never seen my father cry before.  I don't know if it was because he found out about his illness or if it was from mother leaving him, but he was crying.  

We moved back to Oklahoma for him to have surgery, as a family.  Daddy had a benign tumor on his thyroid gland and he had 2/3rd's of his thyroid removed.  They basically cut his neck from ear to ear to get it out.  I remember going with him to the doctor visits and that he had to stay on thyroid medicine for the rest of his life.  The tumor, even though benign, did a nasty job on his emotions.  He was up high, high, high and kind of mean, and then down, down, down.  At times through the years we could tell when he didn't take his medicine but after awhile he never missed a dose, thank goodness.  

So we were back to Oklahoma.  I didn't live with my family during the week because we didn't have the money for a house yet, and Momma needed help with us, and Daddy.  I stayed in our small town with Granny and Granddaddy during the week so I could go to school, while my brother, sister and parents stayed with Grandma and Grandpa in the country.  I started the second semester of 2nd grade at my old school and I had to remake friends, yet again.  Luckily I had another great teacher but I certainly struggled, and by third grade I was nearly kept back if it weren't for my teacher, mother and the principal.  As I am writing this down I am now seeing what those years did to me.  I am realizing all these upheavals took a major toll and changed the course of the person that I started out to be that fearless, gutsy little girl.  

I was a much quieter person who struggled internally with just being around people.  Honestly 3rd grade was so hard for me in all kinds of ways, so much so that I don't have any memory of even being in the classroom with Mrs. Nolan.  That's very strange because I have memories of every classroom I was ever in, except for that one.  I almost have a dark hole there in my memory.   I didn't even have friends then but 4th grade rolled around and we got new neighbors, and my world got brighter.  Jean Ann and Mike, twins, moved in next door and the fun began.  
From the moment they moved in next door Jean Ann and I became inseparable.  Oh my goodness we had so much fun, and she was a bit of a bad girl, a happy-go-lucky kind of girl, like I used to be.  It was a breath of fresh air.  My, I miss her so much.  Jean Ann's life turned out to be so tragic, but I won't go into that here.  We had about 3 years of great childhood fun and joy before my world again came crashing down.  

Have you ever wished for something and it came true.  October of my 6th grade year (it's funny that my life is not calculated by years, but by grades in school), just before Halloween, my wish came true.  You see (I've written about this before), at school, we had been playing a lot of hopscotch on the sidewalks at recess.  My aunt was babysitting my brother, sister and I (her first and last time for us) one evening while Momma and Daddy went to a school something.  I really I didn't need a sitter, but they did.  The night before this, sister and I were laying in bed (we shared a bed and bedroom until I got married and moved out) just talking and I made a wish.  I wished I could break my leg because I thought it would fun and cool to walk on crutches.  (Auntie, if you are reading this IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!  I knew better, I was old enough to know better, IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT!)

I built a hopscotch board in the middle of the living room out of newspapers and Daddy's socks and when it was my turn, I had to take a hugely long jump, but I landed on a newspaper, and that newspaper was like surfing on carpet.  I slammed into the wall at the end of the living room and I BROKE MY LEG!  I got my wish, and let me tell you CRUTCHES ARE NOT COOL OR FUN!  
Those damn crutches ruined my life at that time.  I had no aspirations or desires to do anything or be anybody at that time, I just wanted to have my friends in school and that broken leg ruined my social life.  For one thing IT HURT!!!  The other was that I could not go to school.  I was out of school until January of the next year.  I didn't finish the semester in the classroom, but my teacher was my tutor and I stayed up with school work because she came to the house once a week and helped me stay a part of the class.  I passed with straight A's.  What I did miss out on were my friends.  At that young age memory and friendship are fleeting.  Because I could not be around Jean Ann everyday anymore, she moved on to other friends, and I was just not a part of her growing social life anymore.  Jean Ann was a friend, but we weren't besties anymore.  I lost my friend, my happy, my joy, and the loss continued on to the junior high years, the WORST YEARS OF MY LIFE, YET AGAIN!   
It's funny, I tried to find some photos of my junior high years and I only find a few of me  

Yep, those are bell bottoms that Momma made. 
This picture I think I'm turning 13.  That's me all the way to the right.
Junior high years, ages 12-14 when puberty raises it's very ugly head.  I had no friends by the time 7th grade started and Jean Ann all of a sudden began to DEVELOP and I mean develop, so did I, but my personality had been beaten down with the broken leg fiasco.  She became extremely popular and I did not.  In JH you went to different classrooms and we were also segregated into sections.  Jean Ann was section 7-3.  I was section 7-5, the lowest one with some of the nerdiest, most unpopular, quirky people.  I can distinctly remember standing in the hall holding up the wall, trying to become the wall in between classes when a girl came up to me an started talking.  Her name was Sharon and Sharon became my life-line out of becoming that wall.  We became best friends and still are to this day with about a 20+ year break...lol.  Junior high, especially 9th grade, again I will say was horrible.  I don't even know how I got through school except for Sharon and art class.  9th grade brought my period, huge boobs, boys, my first kiss, my first formal and a chance to take a trip.  

Do I look happy or scared.
My art teacher Mrs. Sue Brown taught me so much.  I took her class 7th, 8th and 9th grade and don't know why I didn't go on in high school.  The summer after 9th grade was finished I was given an opportunity to go on a dig.  I loved Archeology and wanted to be an Archeologist at that point (or a veterinarian).  Mrs. Brown gave me some info on participating in a dig somewhere in southeastern Oklahoma, WITHOUT MY FAMILY.  OMG, I wanted to go so badly, but was scared out of my mind about doing it by myself.  I had never been away from my parents except to stay in Jay, Oklahoma with my greatgranny or at granny and granddaddy's overnight.  I just could not get my brave on to do it.  But you know what, I don't think I even asked my parents about it to even see if they would let me go.  Possibly it was money but in reality it was probably because I was scared, scared to death, and that feeling has persisted in my life since then.  Oh, I've ventured off a few times in my life but it takes a lot, A LOT of bravery for me to do it.  

By the time high school rolled around I was just the same old wallflower kind of person, but a wanna-be-hippy.  Oh man, I wanted to go to Woodstock so bad, but that desire was certainly kept hidden and I just recently verbalized it.  The people who attended were definitely not my kind of people...they were rebels, druggies, free-spirited and much older but that didn't stop my desire to go.  I was a wanna-be hippy, a faux hippy.  

I grew my hair long, wore bell-bottom hip-hugger jeans, no bra and a bikini occasionally.  I like acid rock music, actually all kinds of music (without the acid).  I pretty much just rolled along all through high school and graduated with decent grades, lots of dates and a bit of experience in kissing.  Fell in love and cried a lot of tears, lot's of tears but it was okay, I survived without becoming the wall again.  

But I knew that I had no future.  I had no hopes or any idea of going to college and without really trying in high school I knew that the only thing for me was working for my father in the machine shop, getting married, and have kids.  I was stuck in that town with absolutely NO FUTURE but I still had deep-seated hidden desires and dreams, but I lacked the knowledge, bravery, or support to attain those dreams and desires.  

I dated a bit but one guy called back the next day after an impromptu meeting.  Usually, I would have a date, and because I had boobs they thought that I easy but found out pretty quick, I WAS NOT!  Just because I had boobs does not mean I want that.  So they never called back, but The Hubby, well, he called the next day, the next, the next, the next...and now 43 years later...I think he's sticking around!!!
My dreams have changed for sure.  I did get married and have kids but I found new dreams to make happen.  

I went to college and got a degree.
Without planning on it I've sort of fell into a new dream, to become an artist.  At first it was just to deal with the loss of Momma, Gail (my best friend), our dog, being an empty-nester, turning 50, and more,  but as I developed the art connections, got better and found out what I could do with art, well, slowly I made new goals.  

I wanted to be accepted as an artist, to be recognized among my art peers here locally and nationaly.  I've had a magazine article done locally on me.  I've won ribbons!!!  That was exciting because I've never won a ribbon for anything.  I've entered some shows that were a jury process and got in, local ones.  And now I've entered in a couple of national ones, and GOT IN!  That was a biggie for me.  There are a few more goals or dreams in this art journey but one thing at a time.  

At first I was afraid to enter in these national shows because I MIGHT HAVE TO GO to them, but I just bit the bullet and did it and thought, well, I'll figure it out if it happens, and it did!  I got in and I AM GOING to New York with The Hubby.  I probably won't win anything but I already won by be accepted into the show.  It will be an awesome experience and I may never get the opportunity again to experience it, so why not go.  Yeah, look at me strike out.  

I'm slowly overcoming my fears, even if I backslide occasionally, that's okay.  One step, one flight at a time.  Here I am at 63 years of age and I'm making some new dreams come true.  You are NEVER too old, trust me, NEVER!