Sunday, August 09, 2020

A Hippy Tale

I have a tale to tell I guess.  I went to the orthopedic sports doctor a couple weeks ago to see about my hip and she told me that I needed to have it replaced, not later but ASAP.  I needed it because I was risking collapse if I didn't.  EGAD!!!  I was scared.  My sleep has been toss and turn and I've been extremely cautious taking any kind of step just in case.  I mean what do you do after a conversation like that.  I really don't have pain per se in my hip except when I sleep it sometimes is uncomfortable.  I know I don't have much cushion left but there's just not pain.  A lot of my issue is there is absolutely no tork left in my leg.  I can't twist it around and I can't sit with my legs crossed under me AT ALL.  The leg will not open up at all, yet there is not really pain involved.  Plus my leg is shorter.  It was already a tad shorter because it was the one I broke when I was 11 and it was 1-1/2" shorter after being in the casts for nearly 6 months.

So after a bit of research I found a surgeon I wanted to see and got a referral from my ortho doc and last Friday I got in.  I spent a week of sleepless nights, worry, wondering how I was going to manage 6-8 weeks of recovery in my house with needing to work.  I have to do payroll every two weeks and I was in a panic about how I was going to get it all accomplished.  By the time of the appointment with the surgeon on Friday I had come to terms that I could get it done and was ready to mark my calendar and get this over.  So Friday morning, 8 am I was sitting in a room after another set of x-ray's were taken waiting for the doctor.  He came in and didn't show me the x-ray's but proceeded to immediately address my weight and talk about the problem being an arthritic hip, that I had a bit of it in the other hip too.  But the conversation rolled around back to the weight and that until I lost the weight surgery was not going to happen because the healing would be difficult with drainage because of the "oily fat" involved.  Great, really.  I also asked him about the risk of collapse and he said that would not happen, that he had never seen that happen and speculated that the other doctor said it because of my weight but that unless I was hit by a car, would not happen.  That was a HUGE weight lifted off my shoulders, but WAIT A MINUTE!  

Now that a few days have passed I'm getting more and more pissed at the arrogance of him.  I'm getting the impression he was fat judging me to an extent.  Yes, yes, I do need to lose weight and I'm going to try yet again to get it done because I know that at some point I WILL need to have the hip done and I had better lose the weight to help the recovery but I'm really pissed at him and at myself to let this happen.

Thursday, July 23, 2020


Good morning and another day has passed still hunkering down with the virus holding a gigantic umbrella over the world.  Life must go on with a few smiles and laughter though and I choose to do it with granddbaby smiles and hugs.  I've had Snicklefritz yet again this week and we've spent a lot of time playing Uno and Connect 4 together.  I did stop by and see this little dumpling and get a few giggles out of her.
I tell you grandbabies are the best thing EVER!
Sitting with Snicklefritz while she ate her breakfast yesterday I decided to do a bit of sketching.  I've painted and drawn her picture many times but haven't done MinMin yet.  Her momma sent this pic and I thought it would be so cute to sketch and maybe watercolor it later.

I've had a bit of disturbing news and will share here.  I'm getting ready to go down a path I vowed NEVER, EVER to go down but I really have no choice in the matter at this point.

I've been having issues for quite some time with my hip/leg/groin area and prayed, PRAYED it would not mean what I thought it might mean.  Tuesday I went to my sports medicine orthopedic doctor that I saw for my shoulder a year ago and they did tons of x-ray's.  Well, my path is now clear according to the x-ray's, I need a hip replacement.  Damn, Damn, DAMMIT!  After Daddy's fiasco with his I just did not want to go down this road.  Now I have to find a surgeon and see what my options are, what it all entails, how long will I be laid up, etc... you know the drill.  I always said that I would be crawling before I would do this and frankly, I'm nearly crawling.  Plus the doctor told me to not wait to long because if I wait too long I risk the whole thing collapsing!  WTF!  Well, crap.  Her parting words were, "Be Careful!"  CRAP!  I've put the word out for doctor names, specifically robotic procedure doctors because I want the less invasive I can get.  

My worries at this point are work and the studio.  I'm the only one who does payroll and all of the accounting and will have to work it so I can manage being out of the office for that time.  Heck, if I can do the 6 week recovery for the hysterectomy I can do this I think and it's my left leg so driving will be sooner than later, I hope.  


Saturday, July 18, 2020

Embracing the Gray

I am FINALLY done.  I finished it this afternoon after another 4-1/2 hours spent.  I am happy with it and plan on entering it in the Portrait Society something that is coming up.

"Carla - Embracing the Gray"
18x24 oil on linen

Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Plein Air - Portrait learning

Good morning all.  I have been in a bit of a funk since last Friday.  I was turned down yet again for membership in Women Artist of the West for like the 6th time.  I don't understand.  I've talked to several members who can't understand it either and keep encouraging me to try again, and again, and again.  My partner, Linda was turned down again too and she has won 3 national awards.  Not sure what they want from us.  Maybe it's for the best as membership might entail actual work that I really don't want to do.  Linda seems to think we are being black-balled but I kind of don't think that, but we have gotten on the wrong side of one person who is a member, soooo... Oh it can't be.  Although another person we know got in and we were a bit baffled by that entry but we know SHE knows some people in the organization...

Oh it can make you CRAZY!  

But, this morning I opened up one of the art show websites that you enter from and yet again found out that my paintings were denied entry into the online show.  Tomorrow I will find out about another one but it doesn't look promising.  Frankly, I'm getting tired of seeing RED-X's.  I'm thinking of changing my style up a bit...just a thought.  

A few weeks ago I decided to participate in a Plein Air national event.  I know Plein Air (painting outside), not really my cup of tea.  I just figured I would never have gone to the convention so it was an opportunity to learn about en plein air without being outside painting.  So today starts the beginner talks online and tomorrow starts the online convention for real.  I'm excited to extend my art education in this field.  I think today I will paint at the studio while listening to the talk.  I was even able to upload one of my paintings for a possible critique.  Yesterday I also received a huge box of the "goodies" you would normally receive if you attended.  It was packed with paints, a brush, two hats, apron, t-shirt, popcorn, candy, and more.  So fun!!!  

Plus this morning I signed up for the Portrait Society of America webinar in August.  Another week of painting learning.  Can't wait!  I've been working on this one again...

One eye sort of done...

Wednesday, July 08, 2020

I Want My Life Back

Good morning all.  I guess life is going to continue to be just plain weird with this Covid thing.  I'm really over it but it's not over with us as humans.  Kind of a boring life around here.  I get up, have my coffee, breakfast, check my emails, watch a few videos on YouTube, go to work or the work-studio.  Pay bills, pay Daddy's bills, back home for a power nap, fix dinner, watch TV, play a little online gin, read a bit, then to bed to wake up the next morning and start ALL OVER AGAIN!  

At least I do have the studio to go to and paint.  That has been a lifesaver for sure.  These little flowers appeared on my canvas last week.  I'd started them while staying at home and wasn't really sure they would amount to anything, but they did and I am so happy.  
We've still not seen my mother-in-law yet, although the oldest brother-in-law did visit her with mask on and outside. Now we hear that 12 of the staff there have tested positive.  THAT IS SCARY for her and for us for her!  Really, if the young and the other IDIOTS would wear a mask maybe we could get this thing at bay and could go on with life, sort of as usual.  I'm still trying not to watch too much news or the Facebook news (I think that is a bit skewed.)  I guess I choose to stay a bit naive about it all.  As long as I can still order my stuff from the grocery stores, Amazon, etc., then I'm perfectly happy doing what I am doing.  I just want to get through the year to next summer when we officially RETIRE!!!!!  

Also in the studio I decided to go back to the self portrait stuff.
I keep looking at what I've done and it just makes me crazy that I may have messed it up.  I've go so many drawn on canvas and ready to paint but I'm just blocked and afraid to carry on. 
I started this one and my studio partner, Linda, who is a portrait queen said you should NEVER use burnt umber in portraits!  Well, crap.  That stopped my in my tracks as that is exactly what I did.  I am NOT mad at her for helping me, she critiqued my work as I critique hers.  That is what we do for each other and it is INVALUABLE for help in progressing forward in our art journey.  

So, I put it aside for months just staring at it and contemplating what to do, how to do it.  Then I remembered a technique called the Zorn Palette.  It utilizes only four colors:  titanium white, black, cadmium red light, and yellow ochre.  You can get TONS of different colors using only these four colors.  Yesterday I got them out and played with the palette.  EUREKA!  I am so very pleased that it is coming together, finally.  I really want to go back to the studio today but Linda will be there and I have little Snicklefritz with me.  Linda is afraid of being around other people right now or exposing Snicklefritz to anything.  She is teaching students and is around people and I understand that.  I would keep Snicklefritz in my rooms only but still not sure I want to do it.  So probably will opt to stay home.  I'm just thrilled I'm making headway to tackle my problem here.  Maybe I will get to finally finish all those paintings for a show next year.  Oh, and on that note we WERE going to have a show at the Broken Arrow Museum but with the virus we decided to cancel it.  No sense in having an art show when NO ONE CAN COME TO IT!  

Monday, June 29, 2020

Cooking Memories

1967, I turned 11 years old and for my birthday my granny gave me my first cookbook. My brother, sister and I often made something out of it for our parents usually on Sunday evenings for dinner and then we would have some kind of a performance for them. The recipes are SUPER simplified. I happened to have a fairly damaged bag of potato chips and it made me remember the potato chip chicken recipe and thought I would relive my childhood a bit. It was pretty good I must say. Here's to memories

See it's in my lap. This was my birthday and our cousin Vicki came to celebrate with us.

And the creamed corn is homemade, from freshly shucked corn!  Yup, I can cook!

Sunday, June 28, 2020

Happy Blogiversary

Guess what today is...I almost forgot myself.  Yup, 14 years ago today I was sitting at our office, bored out of my mind, thinking about my momma.  She was closing in on the end of her life at that moment and I was also closing in on a deep depression that would keep me in a funk for about 3 years.  Luckily I found art, creating art again and I found myself in the process.  So happy blogiversary to me my friends, I'm happy to still be around, happy and able to share here for my friends to understand a little about me.  

Monday, June 22, 2020

Fathers Day and Birthday's

Yesterday we celebrated all the fathers out there, especially those in our family.  I first went to see my daddy and wish him Happy Fathers Day.  He is definitely getting older and a bit more frail but he's a tough old boot who loves his television shows (The Walton's Gunsmoke, Big Valley, etc.,) his sweet cat Susie and mowing the lawn.  

Later in the day we had the first Fathers Day celebration with our little family.  It was a first for the newest son-in-law.  We had vegan baked ziti and salad, which I must say was devine and a strawberry trifle.  I was so full I thought I would burst.  We enjoyed just hanging and watching old videos of my 30th surprise birthday party that included playing Twister.  Oh my, wish I had that body again.  Life could not be better for me right now.

Today we celebrate Af's 35th birthday.  I cannot, CANNOT believe my baby is 35 years old today.  Where did the years go.  I'm just so very happy to have my family close by now, especially during these days in the world.  I can take a breath of contentment.  

Happy Birthday my lovely, you are the sunshine of my life.

Wednesday, June 10, 2020

Birthday Dinner and More

Birthday food!  Yes this was my birthday dinner at the newly revamped Wild Fork in Utica Square.  I tried to get reservations at Amelia's downtown, but they were booked solid.  For my birthday I wanted to go to a restaurant and ORDER OFF A MENU!  It wasn't our first time out to eat since all the lock down stuff but the other places were small lunch places, this was BIRTHDAY DINNER! It was a great birthday all the way around. 

This week started off with a workshop.  Finally, a workshop.  The last one that was scheduled was for May with Patrick Saunders, and was canceled because of Covid-19.  I was in great need to be with other artists and learn.  (We all were masked during the workshop!)  Luckily my friend and incredible artist (one of the top in the field in the US), Derek Penix had one.  My studio partner, Linda is better friends with Derek and always enlists her to help him set up workshops in Tulsa, so I was able to jump right in.  This may be his last one in Tulsa as his entire family has moved to California and in fact this workshop was on his way out of town.  Derek can be a bit manic in the delivery of his knowledge he has to share with you, but well worth it.  He is absolutely amazing to watch and to listen too.  I was able to get this little Indigo Bunting finished in his class and posted it on Facebook and Instagram later in the evening.  I had three people interested in purchasing it and sold it to one of our cabin friends for a birthday present (they don't read this blog.)  So I know he is going to a loving home.  

Watching Derek paint his famous peaches is just something to see.  He starts out so very abstract with swooshes and swipes and all of a sudden, peaches start appearing.  
I own four Derek Penix paintings and now count this latest one as mine too...FIVE, I own.   
OMG...I love this one and he was hesitant on letting it go because it was one of his favorites, but now, it's MINE!  

Thursday, June 04, 2020

It Rolls Around Every Year

It rolls around every year, that inevitable BIRTHDAY, and I'm glad, happy I'm still having them.  
Today, I am 64 years old.   
I'm a proud 64 and hope to make it to at least 85 or longer if my body and mind hold out.
The hair has already deserted me, at least the color has but I wear my gray quite well I think. 
Onward to 65 and social security, medicare and RETIREMENT!!!